There's always one more town a little further down the track.
I'm thinking I'm done with Seattle, soon. Like, maybe in two or three weeks. I've got some offers to room with a couple of friends in California, but I am in no position to make that decision. Suggestions?
I'd tell you to go ahead and make for California, but the truth is, it's probably going to be no different than Seattle. More earthquakes, less rain.
Situationally, however, it's probably going to be the same. A change of scenery rarely equates to a change of life in my experience. You're gonna be the same you no matter where you go so no matter where you're at, most of your problems are going to be there.
Real change is internal. I know, because it's something I'm struggling with myself. I need to get out of Houston because I have convinced myself that is a place in which I cannot flourish. The problem with that is that I already know that no matter where I go, I'm going to be dragging my same old bullshit with me.
Truthfully though, this place is just full of old horrid memories and bad juju. I don't even live in Houston, I live in Alvin, which is falling into disrepair and dying a slow, barrio death. I just don't want to go down with it.
So, hell with it, go to Cali. It probably won't make a difference but it'll keep you out of Minneapolis a little longer and by the time you have to go back there, everyone will miss you enough to have forgotten what a huge pain in the ass you are and offer you a place to stay for awhile.
Catch me sometime when I'm not utterly full of self pity and self hatred. It happens sometimes, for like five minutes on a Tuesday night or ten minutes on a Sunday afternoon.
Just on days when I'm wondering where my liquor money is gonna come from, don't ask me for life advice. Days like today, I'm remember how, despite thirty five years of practice, I'm still no good at being in the world.
I'd tell you to go ahead and make for California, but the truth is, it's probably going to be no different than Seattle. More earthquakes, less rain.
ReplyDeleteSituationally, however, it's probably going to be the same. A change of scenery rarely equates to a change of life in my experience. You're gonna be the same you no matter where you go so no matter where you're at, most of your problems are going to be there.
Real change is internal. I know, because it's something I'm struggling with myself. I need to get out of Houston because I have convinced myself that is a place in which I cannot flourish. The problem with that is that I already know that no matter where I go, I'm going to be dragging my same old bullshit with me.
Truthfully though, this place is just full of old horrid memories and bad juju. I don't even live in Houston, I live in Alvin, which is falling into disrepair and dying a slow, barrio death. I just don't want to go down with it.
So, hell with it, go to Cali. It probably won't make a difference but it'll keep you out of Minneapolis a little longer and by the time you have to go back there, everyone will miss you enough to have forgotten what a huge pain in the ass you are and offer you a place to stay for awhile.
And then the cycle can begin anew.
Truth hurts, Rev. Thank you. Despite all that, Cali it is. Westward ho the wagons, etc., etc., etc....
ReplyDeleteCatch me sometime when I'm not utterly full of self pity and self hatred. It happens sometimes, for like five minutes on a Tuesday night or ten minutes on a Sunday afternoon.
ReplyDeleteJust on days when I'm wondering where my liquor money is gonna come from, don't ask me for life advice. Days like today, I'm remember how, despite thirty five years of practice, I'm still no good at being in the world.
This makes me sad. If you move out to Cali, we are definitely going back to the Cities when we move. California blows.
ReplyDelete